4/17/12

These last few days have been hectic, scary and eye opening to say the least.  On Friday my step mom Kerry had surgery on her shoulder, on Saturday she had a small heart attack and ended up in the ICU for the night. She is doing much better now and was discharged on Monday... They told me if we had waited much longer...we would have lost her. Needless to say that was scary.  I have been helping get things in order for my dad and Kerry so that my dad can keep working and Kerry can just focus on healing and getting better.  My dad wasn't too happy with me today when I got there and I threw the half eaten chocolate cake that was on the counter, away... he said "Hey I was gonna eat that!" I said "I know, and now you arent".  We ALL need to focus on eating healthy and getting active and cutting out alot of sugar would be a good place to start!  Who is with me? Cut your sugar intake in half and go from there! Walk one day a week and next week two days a week? The following week walk three days? Any suggestions from anyone out there? :)

And moving right along....

Yesterday, my niece Angel (well she isnt technically my niece anymore, but to me she will always be my niece) text me to tell me that she was diagnosed with Papillary Thyroid Carcinoma.... (Thyroid Cancer) its the easiest cancer to deal with, but my heart breaks that she has been through so much in her life.  She will get through this a stronger young lady but if you would all keep her in Prayer that would be wonderful. And since we are on the subject, we all know I have Graves Disease.... well they found some new and bigger lumps on my thyroid. Im going in for a biopsy on April 24... Prayers for me would awesome as well! :)

Today on my way home, I got the call.... the call asking which day works best for Conner's cath lab... I spit it out as fast as I could before I just hung up on her.  "I spoke to Dr Johnston he told me Tuesdays or Fridays.... we decided Friday May 18 would work best for us." And then she said "thats perfect......" and then lost me in my moment of racing thoughts of all the risks to heart catheterization.... I really wish my sweet boy could have a normal life and not have to go through all this.  This heart cath will either fix the problems with the pressures in Conner's right heart, or tell us he needs open heart surgery to replace the conduit.  Im feeling mostly optimistic about the procedure but it still terrifies me that my son will be sedated, intubated, and have yet another procedure...  Can everyone please keep Conner in Prayer?

I will conclude this entry with this....

I have learned so much in my life, and I know I still have my entire life ahead of me. I have met many wonderful people in this journey, and I'm sure I will meet many more.  I have also said goodbye to many people, and honestly thinking about it.... I think that was good thing. I have learned that not everyone thinks the same and that is okay.  I have learned to embrace what was once my biggest fear.  I have shed many tears and said many prayers for children that have earned their Angel wings... This life is different, this life is scary... but I have ALSO learned to focus on the good stuff!  I have learned to "Cross that bridge only if I have too". I have learned to focus on the present.... SO when life is getting you down... Remember this, there are good and wonderful things happening all around you take time to stop and find those good and wonderful things. They will make you smile :)  Don't waste your time on things that, simple put... do not matter. Focus on having good people and a good environment around you at all times, this will also make you smile!  Did you know that it takes less muscles to smile than it does to frown? I want to have happy wrinkles when I grow up dont you?  Find things to smile about!

Much love,
Jessica